We think it will be the easy answer, the quick fix, make everything all right.
Now what? Who is there to help me?
Surrendering the Secret is a study that was designed to help you heal the heartbreak of a past abortion. It is your place to find healing and restoration. Take the quick quiz below and let the healing begin.
Check all symptoms that apply to you
I can’t tell anyone about my abortion.
There are details about the abortion that I cannot remember.
I have lost interest in things I used to love since having the abortion.
I often feel angry and irritable. I have difficulty maintaining relationships.
I use alcohol, drugs, or prescription medications once per week or more.
I find that I am repeating the same mistakes in life.
I avoid people, places, and things that remind me of my abortion.
If any of these symptoms apply to you, Surrendering the Secret will lead to towards healing.
Hi friends, I am looking for some women’s ministry leaders and pregnancy resource centers directors who might be interested in hosting a Life Unstuck, Woman’s event, a Surrendering the Secret ministry training or a pro-life friend or fundraiser in California, Oregon or Washington State in August 2016.
If that is YOU, please message me or leave a comment below.
God is up to some crazy stuff!!
I am on my knees and all ears!
In light of my Jammin’ June Gift Offering shared via an email and the STS Facebook Page,
I wanted to share an email interaction I had this morning.
First, I want to say, my intention is not to “out” anyone, nor to defend my own position. I always welcome any and all input from my friends near and far. I just feel that this particular email presented a valid challenge that I would like to discuss with all of you!
Here was the question posed in response to my graphic above.
“This is very interesting. Why in the world would I want to enter to win a Starbucks gift card?? They stand for everything we’re against. They’re pro-abortion! I haven’t been in a Starbucks for years and don’t plan to go anytime soon. . . .”
Here is my response:
“I completely understand and respect your decision to stay away from Starbucks!! Trust me, these things are a daily consideration for me—Disney, pretty much ANY TV shows, Target, Apple Products….…
Instead of a boycott, at THIS POINT, I feel God continues to lead me into those places to BE THE LIGHT! SO FAR—in my best pursuit of His direction, He has not led me to participate in any particular boycott. He has also never, at THIS POINT called me to pray in front of an abortion mill. Instead, He calls me to open/equip PRC’s placed beside or in front of them.
I honor and respect those like you, He does call to those specific things.
He has given me my own battlefront which I endeavor to honor every day.
Thank you for your kind and ongoing connection with me. I appreciate and value your input!!
I would love to hear from you, my Pro-Life Ministry Friends (I make that assumption based upon your being here, on this website!)
What is your take/calling/leaning in these areas?
Do you boycott? If so who?
I would love to hear!!
I NEVER get tired of hearing the amazing stories of Leaders OVERCOMING the obstacles of Healing the Heartbreak of abortion!!
I just received this tonight!!
Love, love, love the ladies in the group! Amanda is the sweetest thing EVER. They loved seeing you on Video. : ) It was a good bonding night. There were tears and laughter.
I didn’t doubt it for one minute when you told me, “You WILL be under attack”. (You may have heard!) Everything was running smoothly just until I got to the end of my street! Then my car started acting strange. It felt like I was driving with my brakes on. Soon my brake pedal stuck down to the floor and there was a loud hissing noise coming from under the dash above my feet! I made it a few more blocks and pulled into a gas station. Then, it wouldn’t back up! The engine raced but the car would only inch backwards. I called my Co-Leader and without a seconds hesitation, she said, “Where are you? I’ll come get you”. She was there in minutes. We both said “Satan’s not going to win this one.” We arrived at the meeting place before anyone else did. Even had time to get refreshments set up, chairs moved, music going, gift bags and carabiners out, etc.
I felt less organized than I’d planned, but hey, I was THERE! I followed the Leaders Training Manual format and we finished exactly on time – 8:30. Another group member volunteered to drive me back to my car. She even followed me home. The car drove home PERFECTLY! The breaks were working fine and no hissing. I took it to my mechanic and he said he experienced a slight indication of what I’d described when he first drove it, but after that, he said it drove great all day! Hmmmmmm…… He’s keeping it another day to make sure it doesn’t happen again, but I think the “hissing” and the “breaks on” tell the story!
If we weren’t doing God’s work, the evil one wouldn’t have shown up, so all-in-all, it’s a positive thing!
They are going to be journaling this week and sharing their stories next week. Can’t wait for Session 2, although I know that’s one of the harder ones.
A Fellow Healed Heart!
WOW! I love it!!
BTW–Friends, set your calendars for March 30 and 31 for my Focus on the Family radio interview “Healing the Heartbreak of Abortion”.
I received a recent inquiry about staring a new post abortion recovery program that I thought might help others.
The Inquiry is in Black–my response is in BLUE 🙂 Hope this helps answer some questions others may have!
Dear Pat, A new crisis pregnancy center has been “birthed”! It has been a long road of faithful people working to make this happen and our crisis pregnancy center would like to use your post abortion recovery materials.
I am honored!
Our question is what are the materials that are necessary to buy to use your study.
You will need to purchase the ONLINE Leader Training. It is download to your computer then used over and over again as you lead groups.
You need several Leader Guides and the Downloadable Session Videos available through Lifeway Christian Resources.
We have seen your packet on line and would like to purchase that. There are two questions. Do the clients have their own manual? I haven’t found one on your site…..maybe I am missing it. Also how does your book “A surrendered life” fit into the program. Is it a necessity? We are new and under financial constraints currently.
What you recommend that we purchase?
Each participant needs a Learner Guide that they follow along for each of the 8 sessions. Again, available at www.lifeway.com
When time or group meetings are a factor, A Surrendered Life is the CHAPTER BOOK (verses Bible Study) version of the same healing material and steps to healing and can be used in place of the Learner Guides with the same videos and Leader Materials.
A Surrendered Life is an excellent resource for men and couples, as well as weekend retreats.
God bless you for your ministry and creating a training that can be done at our site. I am so devoted to this cause. When I went to training they welcomed me! I will do this work as long as God allows.
God be with you!
I hope this helps!! Our National and State Leadership Team is listed on our website at www.surrenderingthesecret.com for additional support and questions!
Nothing warms my heart more than knowing that a leader out there, who has lots of plates spinning already but wants to HEAL THE HEARTBREAK of abortion, is pleased and blessed by STS!
Nothing that is, besides connecting even closer and sharing Life Unstuck!!
Check this out!
My name is Rhonda Jordan and your Surrendering the Secret has had such a profound effect on me and the many ladies that I have had the opportunity to lead in it. Thank you so much for sharing and pouring your heart out before Him so that He could give you perfect plan to share with ALL of us. I am really interested in leading the Life Unstuck study in my home with a few of my friends that have been thru some very trying times and situations and really need to know that its ok to move forward. I haven’t read the book yet but I feel that this study is going to reach each one of us, including myself, just where we are and give us that umph… we need to continue in Him.
Thank you for all that you do.
God Bless you.
Rhonda Jordan, Director of Client Services
NextStep Women’s Center of Fort Worth
I’m praying YOUR email comes to me next!!
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Welcome to the STS website. We are glad you have stopped by to visit. Our team is HUGE and passionate–over 3,000 leaders across the Nation have been trained to serve or partner with you.
It is our hearts desire to serve you either as a post abortion recovery leader or someone who needs help through this heartbreaking journey!
You can find a list of National Trainers on the STS website HERE. these ladies have years and years on ministry experience and have partnered with STS in national leadership for as long as 7 years!
Below is a current list of active STATE LEADERS.
Please find the one closest to you and connect with her for help and support. If she is NOT in your State she will do all that is possible to help you find someone close to you.
Aimee Beltran St Johns, Mi firstname.lastname@example.org
Aimee’s heart desire and deepest passion is to share the love of Jesus Christ and His plan for healing and wholeness for those misled by the emptiness of abortion. If you are located in Michigan please contact her for help.
Cindy Case Naples, FL email@example.com
Cindy longs to see women become healed and whole from their abortions which then opens doors for healing in other areas of their lives. Her dream is to see Surrendering the Secret in every church.
Jo Lynn Ensor Naples, FL firstname.lastname@example.org
Jo Lynn wants to reach women in her community that are in need of healing and forgiveness from a previous abortion. She believes once a woman has been healed, she is empowered by the Lord to share with others who are post-abortive and with others who are in the position of making the same mistake.
Robin Exum Lubbock, TX email@example.com
Robin is praying for open doors for more women to find hope and healing through the Surrendering the Secret study. She desires to create a place of healing and restoration for women.
Nancy Gaiser Madison, NY firstname.lastname@example.org
Nancy is the Director of a PRC in New York and the post abortion recovery leader. Nancy has formed a team of 10 women who have completed STS and are ready to serve in her area. Nancy has a heart for compassion for hurting women and is ready to serve and minister to those who need her!
Tammy Hauser Valdosta, GA email@example.com
Tammy feels it is a blessing to see women become free from bondage because of a wrong choice. Through her own journey she has become aware of how important complete healing is for a post-abortive woman.
Kathy Hill Mansfield, MA firstname.lastname@example.org
Cathy knows that God wants no one to be in bondage to sin. She considers The Great Commission is her charge. She is a part of God’s army and wants to change the world!
Lynn Mattioli Liberty, NC email@example.com
Lynne leads Surrendering the Secret at her church. Many have responded to her testimony and have been inspired by what she shares about her road to healing.
Katherine Wehler Janesville, Wi firstname.lastname@example.org
Kathy has been part of Stateline Pregnancy Clinic for over 3 years. She leads STS in her local church as well as the pregnancy resource center. Kathy has a heart to help women who have fallen into the lie of abortion and desires to see them experience the freedom and peace that STS provides! Contact her for help in her area!!
Our National and State leaders want to help you in any way possible.
Please contact them for support!
I seriously have been through it all: abortion, miscarriage, infertility, the adoption of a Russian baby and one complete pregnancy that ended with an emergency Caesarean section. I’ve had a hysterectomy. I had an affair, I caused a horrible car accident and was arrested for DUI. I got a divorce and I am married again. All in that order.
I’ve been to many psychiatrists, psychologists, therapists and counselors, as well as the usual gynecologists and infertility specialists. I’ve been treated for bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, severe anxiety, severe depression and chronic insomnia. I have abused alcohol and prescription drugs. They never could tell me why I had four miscarriages in a row, though, even after extensive and invasive tests. Not one of these doctors, ever, asked about my abortion, even though I told each one.
At times, I have been suicidal and on the really bad days, I considered not only killing myself, but also taking my two small children with me. To heaven. Where there is peace. Where I could only imagine I’d finally be at rest.
Can all this be blamed on one day of my life, the day I chose to have an abortion? 30 years ago, on a cold, rainy December Tuesday? You can make your own decision, but I truly believe that yes, all of the pain that I have endured comes from that day when I destroyed a life to try to save my own. And isn’t that ironic?
The lies of abortion begin with the one that says “you’ll never have to think about this again.” The truth is that I did think about it: immediately afterward, how I felt lying on the table, silently crying, with no anesthetic because the father and I could not afford the extra money. I thought about it years later, when I miscarried for the first time. And then again, with the second miscarriage, and the third and then the fourth miscarriage. Eventually, not a day went by that I didn’t think of my horrendous sin.
My closest, dearest friend began working with a crisis pregnancy center in Ohio a few years ago, and she knew about my abortion. She had been my best friend, even then. She suggested I talk to Jill, who leads the post-abortion recovery sessions, and learn about what is involved, but I strongly believed that I was alone in my quiet guilt and sorrow, and I was resistant to talking to someone about it. She continued to gently push me in the direction of talking with Jill, but I pushed back, scared to death to share my worst secret, afraid of being criticized or judged. But when Jill reached out to me, and graciously accommodated all that I asked for, I realized maybe it was time to let go of the past.
I met her for the first time on a wintry Saturday morning, and she encouraged me to share a little about myself and my experience. Although I was terrified to talk to her and tell my story, I knew if I was going to tell anyone, it would be her. I trusted her from the start, and after she shared her own story, I realized I had never heard anyone else admit that abortion had affected them. I knew that millions of children had been aborted since 1973, but I swear I lived my life thinking I was the only person who had ever had one. When she handed me the booklet we’d be using for the sessions, I read the title, Surrendering the Secret: Healing the Heartbreak of Abortion. I thought, “Yes. It’s a horrible secret. It’s time to share it. It’s time to heal.” Jill prayed over me, and I could feel peace beginning in my heart.
My first session was a week or so later, and I had read and worked through the first chapter of the book. Jill began with a prayer, and she turned the television on. Beautiful music filled the room, and I saw women on the screen, who were just like me. They were sharing feelings and emotions that were identical to mine. They began telling their stories, and while they were all different, they were all the same. My story was different, but it was the same. We were all keeping a secret, too ashamed, too guilty, and too afraid to tell anyone. For the first time, I knew I was not alone. It would be awhile before I felt hope, but at least I knew I was not alone.
Over the next few months, we watched more video of the women sharing their experiences, we read from the Bible, we prayed, we shared, we cried. I told her how I would hear songs of forgiveness and hope on Sundays, but I didn’t believe they applied to me. I thought my sin was too great to be forgiven. But, I heard over and over through prayer and psalms and Gospel how loved I am and cherished by God, and I began to reject the lies I was told: the lie that I am worthless, the lie that I am not loved, the lie that I could never be forgiven, the lie that I am nothing more than my abortion. I saw how beaten down I had become, I saw how I hated myself, and I saw how it affected my life. I recognized how despair, regret and anger affected my relationships and ruined my first marriage. At church on Sundays during this time, I would listen to the sermon, and every Sunday, it was as if God was speaking to me through those words. Sometime during those snowy, cold Tuesday evenings, as I cried in that room with Jill, and I felt all the emotions I could feel, I also accepted God’s forgiveness. I actively accepted how wrong my abortion was, I loudly said I was sorry and asked for forgiveness, and when God quietly offered it to me, I humbly, gratefully accepted. I healed.
But my parents still did not know about my abortion – I had never told them. God loves me exactly for who I am, but my parents? I truly thought that if they knew my full story, they might not see me as the daughter they thought I was. It took me almost two more years after meeting with Jill to work up the courage, and I repeatedly asked the Holy Spirit for guidance and a “good time” to talk to my mom and dad. That “good time” happened just a few weeks ago, over breakfast and coffee at my home. I told my parents about my abortion and I asked for their forgiveness. I don’t know why I would ever have doubted their love, but like God, they assured me their love hadn’t changed and never would. It’s only because of their love and God’s that I can share this today. It’s only because they know, and it’s no longer a secret, that I am able to write about this and share it publicly.
Early in our work, Jill once told me that abortion was like a scar. When the injury happened, it was painful and it bled. As it healed, if you touched it, it might open and be bloody and painful all over again. But once it was healed, the scar was only a reminder. You could touch it, and know it happened, and remember it all, but it didn’t have to hurt anymore.
She also gave me a photograph of what I now know abortion is: a woman with her face in her hands, on her knees, in front of a child. The woman is clearly weeping, and the child touches the woman’s head. “Peace, Mom. You are forgiven.”
Postscript: I no longer take psychiatric prescription drugs of any kind, and I have not been treated by a therapist or psychiatrist since spring 2014, after I completed STS.
Thank you for the opportunity to share both a written testimonial and a video that were done for the crisis pregnancy center where I completed both the STS journey as well as the STS leader training.
Happy New Year STS Friends,
Every January marks another year of the heartbreak of abortion. January 22, 2016 is the 43rd Anniversary of legalized abortion in America. We have lost close to 60 MILLION innocent lives and left hundreds of thousands of men and women tossed and turned in the wake of the UNPLANNED horror of an abortion choice. I know, I am one of them. Maybe you or someone you love is as well. In fact, I KNOW someone you love is! The statistics range at 43% of ALL WOMEN of childbearing age has made this deadly choice. If you have been praying about leading or spearheading a post abortion recovery group in your church, PRC or community. STS is here to help. Please check out our variety of products on the LIFEWAY website.
Also, STS has an easy to follow downloadable AUDIO training available here on our SHOP.
Lastly, I am available on a few limited occasions to come to your church or pregnancy center to lead a face to face training. Email us at email@example.com for details.
We are praying with you and for you as you seek God’s plan for your church and community in this critical area of ministry.
In His Grip for Life,