I’m “OK” — So Why Do I Need Abortion Healing?

I used to think my abortion wound was locked away for good — sealed inside a big iron trunk, buried so deep below the surface that I actually lived my life, for a time, as if it had never happened.

One of the most common things we hear from women in the STS Bible study is, “I never knew I needed this.” I understand that completely. I was one of them.

My passion is for women to walk in freedom after abortion, but the first and often hardest step is admitting there’s a wound at all. Abortion leaves deep, intricate wounds in every person who experiences it — no one walks away unscathed. But there are a hundred reasons it’s easy to keep that trunk buried:

• Repressed memories concealing very real trauma
• Life circumstances that seem to settle the question of whether we made the right choice
• The opinions of those closest to us, pressed into our own
• A world that insists abortion is only about “rights” and “choice” — that it doesn’t hurt women, that a child in the womb is somehow not a child
• Plain fear of what we’ll find if we ever open that trunk again

Every one of those reasons is understandable. But not thinking about the wound isn’t the same as not being shaped by it. A trunk stays locked whether or not you remember what’s inside — and everything in it keeps its weight. Healing is a process of going backward in order to move forward, and when we avoid the short-term pain of opening it, we forfeit the long-term freedom on the other side.

Surrendering the Secret is an inner healing Bible study built for exactly this kind of wound. Women who carry it will often sense that something isn’t right and go looking for relief anywhere they can — but this wound needs a specific kind of treatment.

Healing after abortion will not be found in positive affirmations or healing mantras.

Healing after abortion will not be found in a mountain of self-help books.

Healing after abortion will not be found in the coping mechanisms we adopt to numb and distract ourselves.

Healing after abortion is found in one place: the arms of Jesus. Only He can take our deepest pain and make life bloom out of dry, cracked ground.

That’s what happened to my trunk. I found STS through what felt, at the time, like a random coincidence — but was obviously a divine appointment. I finally said yes to healing, and found out just how much I needed it.

As I went through the study, Jesus took my hand and led me to every closed-off room in my heart. He brushed the dust off that iron trunk, opened it, and held what was inside up to His grace and truth. For eight chapters, He went with me — uncovering what I’d buried and forgotten, shining light into the dark corners I’d stopped visiting.

We have a saying in the healing community: Jesus cannot heal what we do not reveal.

One of the greatest privileges of serving in this ministry has been watching how gentle and how faithful Jesus is to the men and women who have carried this particular grief — myself included. He is waiting to show you His loving kindness. But first, we have to acknowledge the wound, trust Him as our Healer, and hand Him the key.

So — is there a trunk you’ve kept shut?

Jesus is not afraid of what’s inside it. At Surrendering the Secret, our team isn’t either — we’ve carried the same fears, asked the same questions, and we want to come alongside you. To join one of our healing groups, reach out today at surrenderingthesecret.com/find-help.